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Just Breathe

Before you read any further, I want you to take 3 deep breaths, but here is how I want you to do it.

-Sit back and close your eyes

-Inhale through your nose for 2-4 seconds

-exhale through your mouth for 2-4 seconds

Ready go!

Now, how do you feel?

If you’re anything like the athletes and performers I work with, I’m willing to bet you feel a sense of clarity and calmness. Does your body feel relaxed? You might even feel like it’s time for a nap.

I’m a firm believer in the idea that if you control your breath, you control your mind, you control your body.

Breathing is an automatic or unconscious experience, we do it to stay alive. We hardly spend time actually thinking about the breathing process. When we do focus on our breathing it’s usually because we are not (chances are that you’re underwater), when we are exhausted, and when it’s cold enough to see our breath.

When we focus on our breathing, as I had you do above, it helps us quiet our mind or as my friend James Leath says “starve the anxiety”.

By simply counting our breaths, we make the unconscious conscious. What it also does it lets us put pause on the day, clear our minds and collect our thoughts.

There are so many factors in our day that we can’t control and those instances can stress us out, distract us from our task, or even beat us down. During those moments, instead of focusing on the things beyond our control, focus on what you can control. That starts with our breath. We can always control our breath.

So when you feel stressed, anxious, distracted, or even just unsettled. Take a moment, close your eyes, and breathe.

Control your breath, control your mind, control your body.

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Do not condemn others for your own inaction.

Last week, I had a not uncommon experience while driving. During my daily commute (~50 min) the car in front of me decided that they needed to travel below the speed limit. This drove me nuts!!! How could this car travel at less than the allowed speed on a country highway and impede my progress. How rude of them!! Didn’t they know I needed to be traveling at a faster rate because I was running a few minutes behind! How dare they!

I sat there stewing in my mild road rage while subtly trying to make the driver in front of me aware of my irritation, when I looked down and saw something I hadn’t noticed yet…it was a divided yellow line highway. (Face palm). In my state of annoyance, I ignored the fact that I had an opportunity to act by passing the car (when it was safe of course) and continue at my desired pace. Instead I chose to blame the other driver for this “transgression” and let it impact my mood.

I wish I could say this experience on the road was the first time this has happened for me, but it’s not. I’m sure you’ve experienced this before as well. How many times do we let others hijack our mood or worse our entire day by their actions and in the process ignore our own opportunity to act? Next time (because it’s bound to happen again), when you have a transgression lobbied against you, instead of blaming the other person, take pause to see what you’re able to do in that moment. Is there a course of action you can take? Do not blame others for your own inaction.

As if on cue, the driver in front of me turned left off that road and left to ponder my realization while driving at my own pace. As the car faded off into that side street I nodded in their direction to say thanks for the lesson.

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5 Books that were Game Changers

Over the last few months, I’ve rediscovered my love for reading. Check that, I’ve been able to make more time for reading. Yes, most the time now it’s more listening in the car, than reading but audiobooks still count.

I’ve always enjoyed reading. Growing up I loved getting lost in fictional worlds/universes. I still enjoy a great fiction book, these days I love all the learning that comes from nonfiction & personal development books. I enjoy learning about new concepts, thought patterns, and philosophies. Now I read with intention to learn and figure out how I can apply the concepts to my work with performers. The more I read, the more I grow.

I’ve encountered so many great books and learned something from each, but I’ve picked 5 books that I feel have had the profound effect on me. Here they are.


Legacy by James Kerr

This is probably my most recommended book at this point. Legacy is a deep dive into the culture of the New Zealand All Blacks. This book explores the pillars that construct culture of this organization. It shows the importance of having a culture rooted in values beyond just winning. Great people make great All Blacks. If you’re a coach, captain, or any other leadership role, I strongly recommend you read this book.

Atomic Habits by James Clear

I just finished this book a few weeks ago and it’s one of the more fun books I’ve read. I came across James Clear a few years ago and always enjoyed his articles on jamesclear.com. Clear focuses on components of behavior psychology explaining how to effectively build good and rid bad habits. This book is the definition of ‘edutainment’, you learn something and have fun in the process. If you’re looking to change your routines or daily habits, start here.

Man’s Search For Meaning by Viktor Frankl

I think anyone who has read this book would highly recommend it. Dr. Viktor Frankl is the father of logotherapy, a psychological concept that centers on the primary motivation of life is for individuals to find meaning. Dr. Frankl developed this theory from his time spent in Nazi concentration camps. The first part of this book is vivid descriptions of the horrendous conditions and experiences in the concentration camps. At times, it’s tough to read. The rest of the book is Dr. Frankl explaining logotherapy in greater detail and how to use it to discover meaning in our lives.

A Million Miles In A Thousand Years by Donald Miller

This book is the sequel of Blue Like Jazz. It discusses Miller’s process of turning Blue Like Jazz into a movie. More importantly it proposes the question of how we can live a good story. It’s Miller’s personal struggle to edit his book and also his life that worth “reading”. This book reignited my sense of adventure in the day-to-day, and is the reason why I will hike the Machu Picchu trail one day.

The Obstacle Is The Way by Ryan Holiday

Ive become a big fan of Ryan Holiday’s work. This book was my first introduction to Stoicism. According to dailystoic.com Stoicism,

“asserts that virtue (such as wisdom) is happiness and judgment should be based on behavior, rather than words. That we don’t control and cannot rely on external events, only ourselves and our responses.”

Simply put, stoicism philosophy helps us “act on what can be acted upon”. It was developed to help us focus on practical application rather than just debates.

The Obstacle Is The Way is a discussion about stoicism in both ancient and present times. Holiday discusses the idea of how we can us the obstacle(s) in life rather than be negatively affected of shut down by them.

After I finished The Obstacle Is The Way, I started reading more books on Stoicism and have begun to apply it to my own life and my work with performers. It’s helped me change my perspective on handling matters in life.


There they are, my current Top 5! Just like the AP poll, I’m sure this list is bound to change the more I read. Each of these books (and many others) have had a strong influence on my life, and I think could benefit yours. What books have you read that have impacted your life or work? What are you reading?

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I suck at writing…but that’s ok.

I suck at writing…I really do. Or at least I think I do…I also haven’t really tried too hard. Sure I’ve written countless college essays, a few short blog posts, at one point a master’s thesis, & I’ve even edited articles and books for colleagues, but I don’t think anyone would venture to say that I am good at writing. Heck, you may think I’m no good just from my first two sentences alone. So if I’m no good at writing, why am I starting a blog? Well I may not be good at writing, but I like the idea of getting better at writing, and thats the point.

Yes, I know, I started my first article off with a limiting thought that embodies the fixed mindset (if you don’t know what I am talking about search ‘Grit’ by Dr. Angela Duckworth). But for some reason, I haven’t been able to shake the notion that I suck at writing. Any time I’ve attempted to write, my thoughts appear as gibberish on the paper/screen. I’m left looking at my thoughts as if they are abstract art, trying to understand what it was I was trying to say in the first place (Its pretty bad when you can confuse yourself with your own thoughts).

I am not sure where I got this idea that I would be great at writing the first time, every time. I certainly know better! Its not like that’s been the case with anything else I’ve ever tried. Improvement is a process that comes with consistent effort and sometimes that process sucks. The painful irony is that I coach individuals about this concept daily. I guess its time I started listening to what I tell others.

We all have to suck somewhere…I mean start somewhere. This blog is my effort to engage in the writing process consistently. The public forum of this blog, is just a form of accountability…intense accountability. If you’re familiar with Jerry Seinfeld and his comedic process, this blog is my version of the “chain” & it’s important not to break the chain.

So here is my master plan. Write something daily and post it…that’s it! It’s a simple plan but it’s also maddening. I think I’ve rewritten this article at least 15 times today and this is just my first one!! As one of my mentors shared with me, never confuse simple with easy! But it’s time to give this writing habit a shot. Sure my writing may suck right now (growth mindset!!), but I’m working on it so bear with me.

There is one more part to my plan I guess. As you…yes you are reading these posts (if you’ve even made it this far), I welcome any and all feedback. If you like something I wrote, please let me know! I’d appreciate the encouragement. If you don’t like what I wrote or think I am getting worse, I’ll appreciate that criticism too…it might just take me a couple of days (weeks) to admit that. If you think you could help my writing, please by all means, you clearly see I need the help. Also I take requests! If you have something you’d like me to write about, please share with me!

I won’t lie this whole idea is intimidating and right now, I feel like the emperor when he didn’t have any clothes. But as the cliche goes, “life begins at the end of your comfort zone’. So here’s to habit building, accountability, being uncomfortable…very uncomfortable. Cheers!

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Welcome to my blog!

Thanks for checking out my blog! My name is Will Drumright and I am a mental performance coach in Indianapolis. Most of my posts are going to revolve around performance psychology and stoic philosophy. I’ll throw a few ramblings about life in here too.

More importantly, as you’ll read in my first post, this is my public effort to engage in the writing process. Let’s see how long the chain can get.

Thanks for stopping by.

Perfect Your Pregame Playlist

The other day I was working with an athlete on focus, specifically getting focused before game time. I asked him, “what helps you get ready for the game?”. He responded, “Well music does.” I said, “Great! What all is on your pregame playlist?”. He stopped thought about it and said “Well, I don’t have a specific one, I mainly just listen to Spotify or Soundcloud”. I let him know that we were going to stop right there and put one together for him.

During this process, I asked him, what do you need to do before your games to become focused. He let me know that he needed to get hyped up and excited. So we focused on a few songs that would get him hyped! We made sure that each song was going to be one to help him get excited, and we even removed some songs after we added them because they weren’t as “hype-worthy”.

As we were doing this I shared some of my old pregame playlists to give him an idea. Well, mainly I dated myself with some of the music. I don’t know if I lost or gained credibility with my music.

When we wrapped up we talked some more about how music can be beneficial to the pregame routine and using it specifically to get us hyped up. We determined a plan for how to use it with warmups and wrapped up that session.

Music is a powerful tool! It can help us deal with emotions and even change our mood. Think about it, you probably have one song that always puts a smile on your face, you maybe have one you associate with a breakup, and you probably have your hype/fight song. I have one for each of those. When we use music to help us get in the correct mood for the event, it heightens our focus.

Now this doesn’t mean that you need to listen to a hype playlist before every big moment. Maybe you need something smooth and light to help you relax before a big event. For me, I have a playlist that makes me want to dance around and have fun, before I give a presentation or have a session. Its much different than my old hype playlists, but it helps me lock in as a prepare to perform.

Do you have playlists for different moments? Are you using music to help you get prepared or focused? Take some time today putting a few songs together and making it a specific playlist. See how you can use it to change you mood!

A Lesson from Neil Gaiman

Last week I arrived 30 minutes early to a meeting…It wasnt because I was trying to be diligent and arrive early, its because I totally messed up the time. Since I had that extra time on my hands, I decided to go for a walk and listen to a podcast I had in my queue. The episode was Tim Ferriss interviewing author Neil Gaiman. Neil Gaiman has written many books and two that I have particularly enjoyed, The Graveyard Book & American Gods. If you’re looking for a good fiction read I would start with both of them.

During the interview, Neil talked about his approach to writing, and the many ins and outs that come along with his process. He is a fascinating man to listen to, plus he has a great voice. One thing that Neil said stuck out to me during this conversation. When he was asked about setting aside time to write, he said that “When I set aside time, I tell myself I can write or do nothing, and doing nothing is quite alright but for that period of time that’s all I can do.” For Gaiman, he makes it distinct, writing or nothing. No gray area no in-between.

What stood out to me most, is the idea that even tho he wants to write, he accepts that doing nothing is perfectly acceptable. To me, doing nothing would drive me mad. If I sit down to write, I have a billion thoughts pop in my head. In fact yesterday I sent two emails and called someone during my “writing period”…then eventually got around to writing my post. But the point Gaiman is trying to make is that you have to be fully committed to that time period, and not allow yourself to become distracted by other items.

The other point Gaiman makes with this is “after sitting doing nothing for a little bit, writing seems a bit more appealing to you”. I honestly hadn’t thought of it that way before. It makes perfect sense, but it takes discipline to sit and do nothing instead of write. Its so easy these days to scroll, browse or fine other things to do, but if you sit with the process and it results in nothing then you’re committing to your process.

It may not even be writing. It could be studying, practicing, working, or whatever it is you may want to do. Try it out this week. When you need to get something done say that you can do that one thing or nothing at all…and that means nothing. See how this process goes for you.

Thanks for sharing Neil!

The How

The other day I was watching a coach working with a player on a position specific skill. It was related to footwork and the young man kept making the same mistake. After a few more reps, the coach’s patience ran out, and he told the player that he was “just doing the same thing over and over, and he needed to have a short term memory because that was important to being a great football player”. As I sat there watching this interaction, I could see the player become more and more determined to do it correctly, but then I also saw him become confused once his coach said something about having a short term memory. I wanted to go interrupt the lesson and help both parties out, but that would have been pretty rude. Unfortunately the coach had the athlete thinking about having a short term memory, rather than working on it. He left out an important step, something I call “The How”.

“The How” is basically the process of achieving a successful outcome or goal. A lot of times as coaches (myself included), we focus on “what” we are going to do, and don’t spend as much time talking about “how” we are going to do it. When we ask a young athlete to work on a new skill, such as having a short term memory, it’s important we explain how to the athlete(s). If we just tell he or she, that they need to do this, we have left out a crucial ingredient to this process.

Discussing “The How” with athletes also lets us as coaches help walk them through discovery. We can share with them the steps to help them produce a new outcome for this specific rep, while also letting them figure out how they can use it for other areas of performance or life. If you give them a process, then they learn how to achieve new results.

So if you are a coach or a leader, take an inventory of how you work with your current athletes or team. Do you spend time just on “The What”? How can you better explain “The How” to your group? Take that extra step in coaching and see what you and your team are able to achieve.

Happy Opening Day!!

Happy Opening Day everyone!! In case you missed it or aren’t sure, it’s opening day for baseball! To me opening day is the official start of spring. Yes I know it was technically last week, but I always felt when baseball was on at 1:00pm, it was officially spring.

If you haven’t been to an opening day game before, I definitely recommend it. At the very least, it’s an excuse to take a half day off work. It’s such a fun experience at the ballpark. Everyone is full of hope for their teams and enjoying the spring weather. I’ve attended one spring opener and it was a blast (RIP Turner Field).

So take some time today and catch part of a baseball game and celebrate the arrival of spring!

Red Sox are going 162-0 this season!

Digital Detox

This week I am taking a digital detox. Well I guess it’s more a social media hiatus, but Digital Detox has a much better ring to it.

I enjoy doing these detox weeks from time to time for multiple reasons. First, I realize how much time I am spending on my phone, or really how every time I get on my phone I am checking in with social media with out even really thinking. Then all of a sudden I am scrolling for ten minutes and not even checking the email or text that I needed to do in the first place. Talk about being distracted! This weekend I realized I was all over my phone trying to keep up with all the march madness and it seemed like my world became the iPhone.

I also enjoy doing it because it becomes relaxing. Yes the first couple of days are rough because the habit of checking your phone, but once you get past that it really does feel good. My urge to check in with social media to see the latest post or information is sedated as I step away from the digital world. It seriously is much calmer, and I realize that I don’t miss as much information as I thought I would. So instead of reading the same post over and over again hoping it will change, I spend my reading different material.

Last reason I enjoy it, is because my productivity skyrockets! No surprise here. It’s the simple equation, removing a distraction, will improve your focus. Instead of being distracted by all the posts and dopamine infused apps, I am able to spend more quality time on my work. Not only that, instead of tweets, I am now reading different content. Content that is personally beneficial and thought provoking. I love clever tweets and IG posts, but when you replace it with a thought provoking article or a unique TEDtalk, it fills your brain up with creative fuel.

If you haven’t done a digital detox before I certainly think you should give it a shot! Try it for a week and see how it goes. Once you make it through the “withdrawal” symptoms, I think you will enjoy the detox.

Rough Drafts

Well I wrote 3 different rough drafts today and I couldn’t finish any of them. Seriously, had an idea wrote each of them out and then froze. My first one was about the Tom Izzo video from this weekend (Its ok for a coach to yell once in awhile). The second was about Special Olympics (This organization is great and has an tremendous motto). The third was about a digital detox (basically I am taking a break from devices & social media this week). Didn’t finish any of them.

I can’t decide if its writer’s block, laziness, or anxiety. If I had to bet, I bet its the anxiety of finishing a post. Yes I still experience that. I drill down on a topic wanting to make the point exceptionally elegant and I sound like a small child learning how to read. It’s pretty funny now that I think about it.

What I have found, and most of you already know, is that any skill takes not just practice but deliberate practice. This idea of being very intentional about using your time most effectively in regards to skill improvement. Setting the time and goals for each practice helps you become very deliberate with your work.

If there is something you are working towards, how is your practice plan. Is it set up in a way for you to experience gains and track your progress? If not, then take some time ahead of practice to structure your time. I think you will enjoy how much you are able to accomplish with your time once you do that.

For example, here is my plan tomorrow for writing. When I wake up I am going to hit the treadmill, finish up my thought process and post it out. I already have ideas, now its just about finding the time to flush them out. Whats your plan for tomorrow?

March Madness!!!

I love March madness! Honestly, this weekend may be the best sports weekend of the year. Games on nonstop and you never know what is going to happen.

What I enjoy the most about these games is watching teams who I wouldn’t normally watch succeed during the games. You’ll see teams you haven’t really heard of before show their success and process during the game. It’s a ton of fun to watch. Even if it means it’s at the expense of my bracket.

What I’ve come to learn from watching these games, is it doesn’t matter where you came from, it matters more about your game that day. That’s why upsets happen!

Never dismiss where you are at, but instead focus in on what makes you and your teammates successful!

Enjoy the madness!

I missed yesterday

That’s right! Two weeks in and I missed my first day! Dang it! Funny thing is I had an outline done in the morning I just didn’t follow through with it.

In fact after I wrote my initial topic, I decided I wanted to start another topic. So I saved my first draft and then started another. Later on while I was driving I started thinking about a new topic, and I really liked that one. So I made some notes on a 3rd.

So I wrote 3 outlines yesterday, but didn’t commit to 1, so I missed my personal deadline. If you know me, then you shouldn’t be surprised I got distracted like that. The frustrating part is, I did the work I just didn’t follow-up on it. That’s where the fortune is, the follow-up. Committing to the first idea, while making notes on the other topics, could have put me ahead, but instead I chose to multi-task on my writing topics.

There is some good that comes from this error though, I noticed I’m much more in the habit of writing. I would see something or read something, and consider how to put it into my own words. The habit is forming! Now it’s just about following up on that habit and starting a new chain!

Use Your Self Talk

There you are, standing over the ball at the tee box ready to drive the ball 200+ yds down the middle of the fairway. You swing and WHACK…the ball hooks left into that nice grove of trees beyond the rough. Before you have even finished your swing, you begin to colorfully explain to the world how much you suck at golf (or is that just me?). Truth is, we’ve all been there. Maybe it wasn’t on the golf course, but we’ve all had bad self-talk on the court, the field, or the boardroom.

Recently while working with athletes at differing levels, I have realized how bad self-talk has gotten. Constantly I’ll hear athletes start cursing at themselves after they have hit a bad shot, or self-deprecate after dropping a pass, or even worse talk to themselves passive aggressively about their bad performance. It’s a terrible symphony listen to and after that first error or mistake, only seems to crescendo.

Through these experiences, and my own, I’ve realized that, many athletes don’t know how to use self-talk to their advantage. They may have heard that self talk is important, but hasn’t explained how to actually improve their self-talk. Here are 3 ways athletes can begin to work on their self-talk.

Use a Reframe Colum

Take your athletic journal (or sheet of paper if you don’t have a journal) and split it into too columns. At the top of the left column, write “Negative” and at the top of the right column, write “Positive/Effective”.  Under the negative column write down the negative self-talk you find yourself using when you are practicing or competing. Then in the positive column, rephrase or reframe it to be a positive statement.  Here is an example:

NEGATIVE POSITIVE/EFFECTIVE
“I suck at this!” “Ok, I can do this!”

Using a reframe column is helpful for two reasons. First, it helps us identify the negative statements that we almost unconsciously will say to ourselves when we compete. Secondly, reframing it to a positive statement helps us prime our brain by thinking about the positive way to talk to ourselves. So when we do get tempted to verbally beat ourselves up, we have a positive statement locked and loaded.

Get Instructional

A lot of negative self-talk revolves around results. “I suck at tennis because we can’t get a serve in.” “I suck at curve balls because the batter hits a home run every time.” All of a sudden our words have shifted our focus away from the process, to the result. Getting instructional is all about bringing us back to a process oriented focus.

Instructional self-talk is all about getting back to the basics and becomes tactical. What is the one thing you need to remember to have a good serve or a good curve ball? What is your routine? Tell yourself that simple cue, so you can focus on making the next play. If not, history may repeat itself.

Thank you for sharing!

Look, we’re human, bad self-talk creeps in from time to time as much as we try to prevent it. Can I let you in on a little secret…you don’t have to own it, its just an opinion.  Even the most positive people you know have negative thoughts from time to time, but it doesn’t define them, so why would you let it define you? “Thank You For Sharing”, allows you acknowledge the self-talk as an opinion and then move on from it. It’s the same thing you would do when someone has a critical opinion about you. You say, “Thank You For Sharing”, but I’m going to go with this opinion over here. Acknowledge the thought and move forward.

Its been stated that a person has around 60,000 thoughts a day, so even when we aren’t aware of it, we are engaging in self-talk. To use self-talk to our advantage, we have to treat it just like any other skill and work at it. The goal of working at any skill is to become consistent at a high level. The 3 exercises above, Reframe Columns, Get Instructional, Thank You For Sharing are all designed to help you become more consistent with your self-talk so that you can feel more confident about handling yourself no matter the situation you may be facing. As always, these skills won’t work unless you do.

Its not just about having a game, its about being on your game.


Wear Your White Belt

A few years ago I was listening to a colleague give a presentation about his work with teams and how he creates the materials or lessons. One of the aspects he shared during that talk was the concept that even though he is a subject matter expert, he goes into every situation with the perspective that he is a white belt.

If you aren’t familiar with the belt system, they used in martial arts to denote an individual’s current level of skill. The highest level is a black belt, which means that an individual is of high skill and essentially an “expert”. The lowest level is a white belt, which means a person is just a beginner.

While my friend is viewed as an expert and knowledgeable, he maintains the idea that he is a white belt, and has a chance to learn something in every situation. He shared that the idea or image of a white belt, allows him to set aside his ego about all of his efforts to become a subject matter expert and allows him to be open to the experience and willing to grow.

This idea has stuck with me since that presentation. It’s been humbling to accept that I may know a lot of things, but there is always something I can learn from someone and any given situation. If I allow myself to focus on the fact that I am the “expert” then I am shutting down opportunities to learn something new, and even connect with someone. When I don’t “wear my white belt” then my ego tends to become a 2×4 and smack me across the face.

Throughout this week, try “wearing your white belt” when you encounter different situations. You may be surprised what you learn, and what opportunities it opens you up to. There is always something we can learn.